Pregnancy Parenting

During pregnancy, even a surrogate pregnancy, a woman’s body goes through many changes. Hormones are raging and then suddenly, the baby’s born. During the postpartum period following the birth of the baby, 4-6% of women find themselves experiencing what is commonly known as postpartum depression (Baby Blues), postpartum anxiety and/or panic disorder. These disorders can occur separately, or in conjunction with one another due to changes in hormone and neurotransmitter levels during pregnancy. Women who have a past history of panic attacks are more likely to develop a postpartum disorder, as well as those with a family history of anxiety and or panic disorders. Another common cause is a great amount of stress; it’s normal for new mothers to worry about their new baby (or babies!) and the additional responsibilities, but women who are affected by postpartum anxiety and/or panic disorder experience excessive worries and fears about the child, and their own actions as well.

Postpartum anxiety is a mood disorder that can cause women to suffer from panic attacks, experience overwhelming anxiety and even agoraphobia, which is a fear of open or public spaces. Panic attacks can be terrifying and can strike at any time and without warning, so the fear is always there that another is going to occur. Diagnosis is made a psychiatrist or psychotherapist by the presence of at least four of fourteen symptoms as defined by the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. Symptoms of anxiety often include difficulty concentrating or remembering, difficulty finishing tasks, trouble making decisions, difficulty relaxing, insomnia, exhaustion, feelings of extreme uneasiness for prolonged periods of time, loss of appetite, and suicidal thoughts. The most common symptoms of a panic attack are shortness of breath, choking or smothering sensation, chest pain or discomfort, palpitations or increased heart rate, hot flashes or chills, trembling, tingling sensation, dizziness, nausea or indigestion, depersonalization or the feeling of being removed or disoriented from everything going on around you, the fear of going crazy or doing something uncontrolled, and the cardinal sign, a sense of impending doom.

Postpartum psychosis occurs when hallucinations or delusions are present, which is rare but can occur, especially in women who were bipolar or schizophrenic already. Surrogate pregnancy may be especially susceptible to these conditions. This is considered an emergency and help must be sought immediately to protect the safety of the child and the mother. Common treatments for postpartum anxiety or psychosis, and panic disorder are anti-anxiety/anti-depressant and/or anti-psychotic drugs in combination with psychotherapy, which has been proven to be more effective than any intervention alone in some cases. Anti-anxiety medications like Xanax, Ativan, or Valium are helpful in a panic situation to treat the symptoms immediately, whereas anti-depressants like SSRIs or selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors may take up to three to four weeks to become effective. Psychotherapy can help women learn to recognize triggers of anxiety and panic, and how to quell the uncomfortable symptoms through deep breathing, relaxation, bio-feedback, and other techniques. Fortunately, postpartum anxiety usually doesn’t linger forever; it’s just a small roadblock that you have to get around.

In retrospect, how would you rate your parents on a scale from one to ten? This is based on their parenting skills overall. I would probably give my parents an eight or nine. I truly can’t recall many things I would complain about. They did a wonderful job as far as I’m concerned, and after all the things I’ve heard in life about other people’s parents, I was definitely fortunate. No, my question is; are you a parent yet? If so, you may want to evaluate your own skills and methods. I do this once in a while. I try to be the absolute best dad I can be, and I strive to improve where improvement is needed. We all should do this. It goes without saying that parenting is the most important role you will ever be given. And if you discover that you require some assistance with your methods, it’s not a big deal. This is what contemporary parenting programs were designed for. Keep in mind surrogate parenting programs.

Some parents should have never had children. If you’ve witnessed or known a few individuals like this, you certainly know where I’m coming from. Even the best parenting programs probably wouldn’t help them much. I am acquainted with one guy who never pays his four children any attention. Yes, he actually had four of them. He stays busy with work and golf, while his wife works and handles everything else. He never spends any time whatsoever with the kids, and has no plans to. They seem to be a burden as far as he’s concerned. I call this severe selfishness. At one point his wife wanted them to see a counselor or attend parenting programs, but he refused. This is the perfect example of a guy who should not have had children, and yet he had four. What an idiot! Now the kids lack a father figure, while he tends to his own lifestyle. Many children go through this, whether we acknowledge it or not.

We should all be thankful for parenting programs, including surrogate parenting programs, and helpful websites that offer great advice. There was a time when this information/help could not be so easily attained. If you’re having trouble with your children or parenting methods, then maybe it’s time you acquired some assistance. Find parenting programs near you, or resort to the Internet for advice. There are a number of forums, full of parents helping one another with parenting.